Stuff From The Newspaper

What next? A license to have cat TV on a big screen?

Daddy brought me home a newspaper yesterday. The newspaper is where people who don't have computers at home go to write. They print the articles they like and give them to people to read. They have a website too, but the newspaper is cool to read if both of your parents are hogging the computers.

There is a section of the paper where people who don’t go to the Newspaper to write can have their articles printed in the paper too. I think the newspaper plays favorites with the people who go there to write because you see a lot of the same names!

Well, one article in the section for people who don’t go there to write really caught my attention. You can see it here: Letters To The Editor. It’s the second article called, “Cats Never Sought Human Contact.” It’s written by an expert on the subject.

What troubles me is what the article is about. Licensing for cats! The city wants me to have a license to keep Mommy and Daddy in my home! I don’t think cats should have to have licenses. That’s just silly! What's next? Will I have to get a license for hunting mice in my own house?

I asked Baggle what he thought about it. He told me, “Cats were once worshiped as gods. I'm still keeping the faith.”

I’m not as religious as my brother. I believe that humans are equal to cats, they’re differently equal, but equal. I read a political book about equality. If you don’t respect that all species are equal, the pigs take over!

Anyway, I’m just kinda upset about having to get a license for Mommy and Daddy. They are staff, not servants. I don’t own them. They work for me. Yeesh!

If the mayor comes to my door and makes me get a license to have Mommy and Daddy, I’ll just have to write a letter to the First Dog!

"I'm Catman?"

I love my Daddy, even if he doesn’t know how to turn on a computer!

I watched a people movie. Well, I watched part of one. They really aren’t that good usually, but I had to watch it because Daddy said something confusing. And I watched some and it still makes no sense. He said he couldn’t help me with my blog because it would be like another Batman. HUH?

Whatever. I just need help to get on the computer. I can type. I can make a mouse do anything. I like catching mice and making them do things! But I can’t turn on the computer! I don‘t know where the turn on button is. I see Mommy just reach behind the computer and it turns on. When I do that, it doesn’t work.

I don’t think Daddy helping me blog would be like another Batman at all because I’m way better than a people movie about bats. I think Daddy doesn't know how to turn the computer on either.

Mommy has been very busy with her scrapbook store stuff and I have been very good about not being bossy, but when I realized that Mommy was the only one who knew how to help me, I had to bug her. Besides, she needs a break from her busy stuff, says Kaline!

Well, Happy New Year to the cats, dogs and people who read my blog! I guess everyone else can have a happy new year too, but if they aren’t reading here, they don’t matter as much. I want everyone to be happy, but I want them to read about me more!

A lot has been going on since the last time I blogged!

First off, I’ll mention that the new dog house STILL isn’t done for President Bark! Yeesh! I heard that he’ll finally move in this month. It’s about time! Mommy and Daddy both think it will be a good thing for the country and well, I have friends that are dogs now, so I guess a First Dog is okay. As long as the importance of sharing with other species is represented and the puppy has good staff...well, you know what I mean, dogs don’t really have staff. They aren’t known for their management capabilities, but as long as he is a good representative for the luxurious treatment of other species by humans, I will give my respect to the First Dog of the USA.

This is the worst time of year for Cat TV! Mommy and Daddy don’t open the big screens as much, but that’s okay. This is the time of year for The White Show - I hate documentaries! They are too low action. Older cats seem to like it, but I need more going on!

We had the cat toy tree again this year. I think Mommy and Daddy put it up so we have something to do during The White Show. But the tree shrunk! I went to climb in it, to try to catch the angel, and I got just a couple branches up and just couldn’t get through! I didn’t know trees could shrink! I think it’s just getting old. Things shrink when they get old. We need a new tree that’s as big as the one we had when I was a kitten!

Would you believe Mommy and Daddy got married again last month? Yep, they dressed up one day to go out for a while, and when they came back they said they were married. I heard Mommy call her friend and tell her. They sure made a big deal about it this time. It’s not like they never got dressed up before. Parents are so silly, but I kinda like that they made a big deal about getting dressed up this time. We got extra Steenkey Treats that night!

Oh, and Mommy has had an awful cold! I changed my name to the same last name as Daddy and Baggle right after I moved to Ohio. It was easier when we went to my new doctor’s office if I had an Ohio last name. One day when Mommy went out, she came home with her new name on papers. I guess she must have had to go to the doctor for her cold, so they changed her name to an Ohio name too. Well, we are really all Ohio residents now. We all have the same last name!

Well , I think I’m caught up now. I need to figure out how Mommy turns the computer on so I can do this without help next time!

What's This World Coming To?

Cats are getting squeezed out! I don’t think I like people government!

I don’t know too much about people government and I don’t really care about people politics. I really don’t. As long as they aren’t going to disband the SPCA, I don’t care. At least I used to not care. This year the people hired a new president and I’m worried.

My Aunt Azzie was really big on people politics. She used to watch them on the people-TV with her Mom. Aunt Azzie told me wonderful stories about President Clinton. He was one of the Dem Cats and the First Cat was named Socks. Then there was President Bush, she said everything he did was someplace else, nothing in America, so he wasn’t anyone important to an American cat.

The new president is President Barack, which just sounds a little bit too much like “bark” to me! And to make it worse, when he thanked everyone for hiring him, he said he was going to get his daughters a puppy. A puppy? A PUPPY? I KNEW it! His name IS too much like bark! They hired a dog-person!

To make matters worse, Mommy and Daddy were both very happy about it. They helped to hire a guy who likes DOGS!

Oh, it’s bad. Let me tell you!

Mommy and Daddy have that big people-TV, it’s not quite as big as our big screen cat-TV, but it’s big. It’s big enough that my friends Puff, Don’t Panic and Little Bear live on top of it. Well, it quit being a TV. Mommy and Daddy said it became a big blue radio.

They decided they didn’t want a big radio. Mommy needs to make a phone call to see if they can have someone make it a TV again. If they don’t make it a TV again, they’re going to get Papa to bring one of my Uncles to help take it away! Where will my friends live if they take away their home?

It’s not like President Bark will help a CAT’S friends!

And then last night, before Daddy got in, Mommy moved the metal box with the strings that is on the table next to the people-TV and put it on top of my blanket on the seat I watch TV on! It took up almost half the space!

Then, THEN, Daddy came home and instead of yelling at Mommy for doing that, he brought down another people-TV and used up the rest of my seat! He really did! Can you believe it??

To top it all off, this morning while I was TRYING to get a little space around that dumb old people-TV to peek at Cat-TV, Daddy finally did yell at Mommy. He told her not to open the screen on Cat-TV so much because the people-TV is in front of it.

I’m at a loss for words!

The people hire this dog-guy for their president and they start abusing cats. Their new president guy hasn’t even started working yet. He’s been hired, but he’s waiting over two months to start. It’s something about time to move to the city he has to work in, but the house isn’t finished yet. President Bark is moving into his house in Washington in January, after they paint it. I guess the PUPPY has to have a white house!

What’s this world coming to?